They think they are God's gift...

I BEGIN this long overdue blog post by explaining my unique position for those from all over, who don’t know me personally. Apparently there are people in America and Australia reading this blog now, as well as the Malaysian faithful. Thanks, by the way, it’s awesome that you take the time.

When it comes to roles in church I have held the title and responsibility of being a senior leader in the church my husband and I planted.

Through a God-ordained set of circumstances we gave away that role and position to come under the authority of two people who we consider to be world-class leaders and pastors. This brought with it a new privilege of being a ‘campus pastor’. We still lead, but under the authority of our senior pastors.

I also ‘do the work of an evangelist’ for a Christian charity, and both my husband and I though two years apart in age and reared hundreds of miles away from each other, both received a public and indisputable call to ministry age 13.

Ministry, and all that goes with it, is in my blood.

But just like other things that at times infiltrate your bloodstream, ministry, unless you’ve been there, and walked the path, and carried the weight, and experienced the joy, and celebrated the highs, and cried in the lows, is something many people don’t ‘get’. And why would you?

While we aren’t all called to walk in the same shoes, or tread the same path as those who God has appointed to be our leaders, I believe whole-heartedly that we have a responsibility to take the time to understand what that ‘looks like’ for them.

After all, how can I pray for my leaders (Heb 13:18) if I haven’t taken the time to gain the slightest bit of insight into who they are and what their lives look like?

So if it’s okay with you I want to share some insights I’ve picked up over the years.

Why?

Because Jesus himself gave you your leaders (Eph 4:11) as a gift to the church.

That’s right, they don’t just think they’re God’s gift, they ARE God’s gift, and as such I don’t believe we have any right to question that, but instead to value the gift, to treasure it, to make sure it’s a well-looked after gift.

It will also be highly unlikely that your senior leader can ‘raise you up for works of service’ (also Eph 4:11) if you have heart issues with your leader. I’m not saying you do have issues… but just in case you know someone who does…

Here we go. It’s not bullet-pointed and it doesn’t have quirky headings. I just felt God prompt me to write this.

Being a pastor is the greatest of joys and the heaviest of burdens.

It says in 1 Peter 5:2 (The Message (MSG)

5 ^1-3 I have a special concern for you church leaders. I know what it’s like to be a leader, in on Christ’s sufferings as well as the coming glory. Here’s my concern: that you care for God’s flock with all the diligence of a shepherd. Not because you have to, but because you want to please God. Not calculating what you can get out of it, but acting spontaneously. Not bossily telling others what to do, but tenderly showing them the way.”

There are some days when you simply have no other reflex but to thank God for Him choosing you to be a ‘looker after-er of His people’.

Babies are delivered to couples who you’ve prayed for years to have that blessing, marriages are restored, prodigals return, the most unlikely of people surrender to Jesus and on top of all that God grants your family a financial miracle.

There are the days when every seat is full, hands, hands and more hands are raised heavenward in worship and in response the Gospel, and it would seem that every prayer prayed is fact a prayer answered.

Among the great privileges, though, are some very dark days indeed. Burying a young man, crying with a family as they lose a child, seeing God meet his promise of healing by taking a person home to eternity to name but a few. It’s always an honour to minister in those times. But I can tell you first hand it’s an honour that breaks your heart.

There are ample opportunities to get bitter too. People you invest it walk away.

Actually let me unpack that a bit more.

I once said to someone – ‘it’s so hard when you give your all and that person walks away.’ Their reply I will never forget. ‘But, isn’t that your job?.’

Well, it is, of course. But just like a fireman being hurt in a fire, that’s not the purpose of the job. And when you sit down as a family and decide that God and the building of His church (that’s people… always people) comes before everything else, it hurts, no, it wounds and can often kill, many a pastor, when people step out of your life as easily as they walked in.

Consider this. There isn’t another organisation in the world where you can receive direct investment...

(people speaking into your life, praying with you, crying over your situation, petitioning God on your behalf, pleading with God for a word from Heaven to bring to church on a Sunday, giving up own finance to help you when it’s needed, rarely having a holiday that extends over two Sundays, dedicating your kids, baptising your children, teaching you to budget, sowing to have a CAP centre in the church, building a church so great the world’s very best preachers and teachers WANT to speak into your life, creating an environment where you can forget about the pressures of the world for a few hours and come in and grow, believing your future is better than your past, forgetting your past so you can believe for your future, opening up their home to bring counsel and wisdom, sacrificing their own kids’ bedtime so they can grow themselves as leaders, challenge when it’s necessary, encouragement when you need it even if they need it too…)

...then just walk away, with the full benefit of that investment and no requirement to pay it back. Even Lord Sugar asks for his investment back if the Apprentice decides they are no longer in need of him.

And I say all that simply referring to those who up sticks and ‘move house’ to another church. As much as that stings, the best pastors will find some comfort in the fact those who have gone are still walking with the Lord.

When Instagram starts boasting of their new growth and happiness somewhere else there’s always a moment when even the most beautifully humble of leaders need a check in their spirit, but none of that comes close to when people not only walk away from church, but also from Jesus.

Pastors know that salvation belongs to God. But they also know they stand account for YOUR LIFE. Imagine if you had to give a life account for your child. And not just your child but all the children in your street? Daunting isn’t it.

I can honestly say, before God, that I never more fulfilled than when I serve Him by serving his people. I love to preach and see people come to an understanding of the Good News, and I am thrilled when the broken start to find a home to be restored. But there have been times when it seems like a pointless and fruitless journey.

Forgive my honesty, but I have counselled people into the wee small hours of the morning, cried out to God, fasted and begged for a miracle on their behalf and haven’t even had a Christmas card in return.

I didn’t go into ministry for that reason, and neither did your leader. But encouragement is something we are all called to do.

Listen to this: Hebrews 13:17 (The Message (MSG)

¹⁷ Be responsive to your pastoral leaders. Listen to their counsel. They are alert to the condition of your lives and work under the strict supervision of God. Contribute to the joy of their leadership, not its drudgery. Why would you want to make things harder for them?

‘Contribute to the joy of their leadership’… wow. That’s an ‘ouch’ for me. I know I am guilty of adding to the weight on the shoulders of my pastors, not increasing their joy.

Incidentally, and I would hazard a guess this applies to most pastors, the greatest contribution you can make to their leadership is not your tithe. It’s not even building an awesome team, it’s not the ‘that’s greats’ whenever they preach, thankful though we are for that, it’s simply found in being there.

That’s right. The best way I can contribute and add to my leaders’ joy is to turn up. And keep turning up.

I remember once taking about 16 hours over a two week period to cultivate teaching for a leaders’ night. I missed my sons’ bedtimes, I didn’t  go to a friend’s hen party, I sacrificed a date night and the house was a tip. Three people turned up.

I appreciated the three, don’t get me wrong. From memory I think I may have spiritualised the number three to make them, and me, feel better. But in all honesty, I was gutted.

And just to clarify, not because of what I had given up, but because I had prepared with the people in mind. I had set aside time honestly believing that this teaching would not only help build our church but would help them build their lives and families too.

Our church has a slogan: everyone cares, everyone contributes, everyone’s a soul winner.

Just as a wee challenge – it’s easy to do that for the broken and the visibly in need of God – maybe this week can I encourage you to extend that caring and contribution to your leaders?

Going back to the verse from Hebrews, it’s probably the reason I got thinking about this blog actually.

I’ve heard it used and used it myself over the years, as from different versions it can imply that in ‘increasing the joy’ of our leaders we can make our own lives easier.

Read it again, this time from the New International Version - UK (NIVUK):

¹⁷ Have confidence in your leaders and submit to their authority, because they keep watch over you as those who must give an account. Do this so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no benefit to you.

This is clearer and more understandable. We cannot thrive under someone who is weighted down and finding ministry a drudge. But is there more to this verse?

This time from the Greek:

17   Πείθεσθε  τοῖς  ἡγουμένοις  ὑμῶν  καὶ  ὑπείκετε,  αὐτοὶ  γὰρ  ἀγρυπνοῦσιν  ὑπὲρ  τῶν  ψυχῶν  ὑμῶν  ὡς  λόγον  ἀποδώσοντες,  ἵνα  μετὰ  χαρᾶς  τοῦτο  ποιῶσιν  καὶ  μὴ  στενάζοντες·  ἀλυσιτελὲς  γὰρ  ὑμῖν  τοῦτο. 

Translated:

Obey the leaders of you, and be submissive; they indeed watch for the souls of you, as account about you to give; that with joy this they might do, and not groaning, unprofitable indeed for you (would be) this

I claim to be no Greek expert, but perhaps the point of this is simply that the way we maintain and conduct our relationship with our leaders has greater impact than we at first imagined.

This verse basically says:

‘Do what your leaders instruct you to do because they have responsibility to look after your souls – and they need to give an account on the state of your soul.'

It then adds, ‘baring that in mind, make sure that it’s with joy they can give an account (to God) and not groaning, because that would be unprofitable to you’.

If your leader was asked, right now, to give God an account of your life would it be with joy or with groaning? Interesting eh? And how would God respond to us causing our leaders to groan?

Now listen, I’m not suggesting for a minute that we can lose our salvation or anything similar because we have a bad attitude towards our pastors, but what I am saying is that we each have a responsibility to grow in our own journey with God so that our leader can give a joyful account to God about us. And the way we outwork our own journey so as to give our pastor joy is to… ‘listen and do what your leader says’.

If every pastor in the land received a pound today for all the ‘I told you sos’ they could say, but haven’t, the Forbes Rich List would be entirely made up of clergy.

Here’s a couple of verses that may help us all relate and understand the weight our leaders carry.

Acts 20:28-31 (The Message (MSG)

²⁸ “Now it’s up to you. Be on your toes—both for yourselves and your congregation of sheep. The Holy Spirit has put you in charge of these people—God’s people they are—to guard and protect them. God himself thought they were worth dying for.

^29-31 “I know that as soon as I’m gone, vicious wolves are going to show up and rip into this flock, men from your very own ranks twisting words so as to seduce disciples into following them instead of Jesus. So stay awake and keep up your guard. Remember those three years I kept at it with you, never letting up, pouring my heart out with you, one after another."

Briefly: Pastors are to guard and protect you.

What does that look like?

- speak into your life when they see a pattern of behaviour that could be destructive.

- They won’t just let any loose-tongued Larry speak from the platform in church. What is spoken into you and over you is taken very seriously. As a ‘by the way’ that’s why, often, leaders don’t just let anyone ‘give a word’ or prophecy.

- They won’t just give you rank or position just because you want it. On the flip side they might remove that too.

That verse goes on to say that people who your leaders have helped nourish may also rise up, cause a split and encourage people to follow them.

Imagine if  that was in the job description:

Wanted: gifted communicator, excellent time management, counsellor, leader, management skills, runs own household well, adored by own family, responsible for raising up leaders, championing children, releasing others and protecting people.

Person must also be willing to be betrayed by those closest!

What? Exactly.

Another verse:

1 Thessalonians 5:14 (The Message (MSG)

This one details the way your leaders should conduct themselves. (No pressure pastors!)

^13-15 Get along among yourselves, each of you doing your part. Our counsel is that you warn the freeloaders to get a move on. Gently encourage the stragglers, and reach out for the exhausted, pulling them to their feet.

Be patient with each person, attentive to individual needs. And be careful that when you get on each other’s nerves you don’t snap at each other. Look for the best in each other, and always do your best to bring it out.”

Ha ha.

Get along. Your leader is called to get along with you. Now that you know that, what can you do to make that an easy not impossible task?

They must warn freeloaders to get a move on! So the next time you see someone, or maybe it’s you, being encouraged to not just ‘fill a seat’ but to contribute or serve, understand there’s a Biblical mandate on them to move you from being a ‘taker’ to a ‘giver’.

Encourage stragglers. Easier said than done. But even when it’s thrown back in their face, when ‘I just need space’ is the standard reply, your leader has a God-call to bring encouragement. It’s a tough one, I can tell you. That’s before we get to pulling the exhausted back to their feet.

Just as an aside – this may not be your senior leader doing this himself. He or she, because they care for you, may well appoint a team to do this.

The last little bit leads on to the next.

“Look for the best in each other.”

If only we afforded our leaders the same grace they give us when it comes to this.

In James 3:1 (The Message (MSG)

It says: 3 ^1-2 Don’t be in any rush to become a teacher, my friends. Teaching is highly responsible work. Teachers are held to the strictest standards. And none of us is perfectly qualified. We get it wrong nearly every time we open our mouths. If you could find someone whose speech was perfectly true, you’d have a perfect person, in perfect control of life.”

Just wrapping this epic post up, can I just say, that in the times when things have been most difficult for me, it’s when two things have happened. One – my words have been taken out of context, and two – when it’s as though a person doesn’t really know me.

It’s a very easy thing to read social media and assume you understand the heart and tone of a 140-character message. And just as easy to write a person off because of it.

I want to be honest and say, I’ve done the same thing. My pastors’ will verify that I am more than guilty of over thinking and being ‘hurt’ by statements never intended to do so. In actual fact had I taken the time to think, ‘but is my pastor really going to mean that?’ I wouldn’t have got so worked up.

Just going back to that ‘Look for the best in each other’ – can we extend that to our leaders?

Can we see their passionate hearts, not just the correction that can often bring?

Can we see their commitment and faithfulness, not just feel like they expect too much?

Can we see their generosity of resource and character, even when it brings a sting of challenge to us?

Can we see their dedication and diligence to the word of God, not just decide we don’t agree with their points?

Can we see how they humbly handle their hurts and burdens, not moan when they occasionally snap?

Can we see the weight they carry (still with a smile and still turning up), not expect the world to stop and revolve around us when we have an issue?

Can we see their vulnerability, not see weakness?

Can we see their God-anointing, not doubt their ability?

Finally, can we choose to serve the man and woman of God, chosen and gifted to us by the King of Kings, understanding that it’s the way God intended it?

We won’t always agree.

We won’t always feel like it.

We won’t always want to.

But neither will they. The difference is what we expect of them.

I hope you hear my heart in all of this. I’m not a senior leader any more, so this is really not about me. Nor am I addressing some problem in our church. Quite the opposite. Today I woke up with a great appreciate of my pastors, Jon and Dee Cook (www.mynclc.co.uk) and had prompt from God to not only tell them that but to encourage us all to remember the blessing, and burden, that ministry can be.

Hope it’s helpful.

Linz x