From sickness to salvation...

Call me biased but I am convinced I serve on the most amazing team in church. Currently I have the privilege of helping look after any new people who come to our church, of which there just seems to be more and more of, and I also have the honour of praying and supporting those who respond the the salvation call, which is included in every service that we do.

On Sunday gone I shared a few reflections with our team that I had been thinking through following my extended hospital stay in recent weeks. Is might be helpful for you too.

In Mark 2:17 Jesus himself draws parallels between the work he came to do and the medical profession. He said: "healthy people don't need a doctor, sick people do. I have come not to call those who think they are righteous but those who know they are sinners."

I know for us we don't 'do church' exclusively for those already made whole, but we seek to create a place where those who need Jesus can find him. My pastor, Jon Cook, recently encouraged us to come to church with fresh eyes, to think through what it would be like for someone who is brand new to NCLC, or even brand new to church at all.

So here are my hospital / church musings.

1) what's going to happen?

Having just moved to a new area I had never been to the Queen Elizabeth Hospital in Gateshead before. I have been a guest of other hospitals but this was a brand new experience for me. I wasn't familiar with the building, the admissions process, the protocol, and I had no idea how long I would be there for. A lot of people, who I presumed worked there because they were wearing uniforms, dashed back and forth, busy with their jobs, but there was nobody to reassure me that a doctor would come, or pain relief is on it's way, or even where the toilets were.

It struck me that in the busyness of church life, particularly on Sundays, maybe our guests and visitors could potentially have a similar experience.

Are we helping people navigate a building or venue so they feel 'at home'? Are we taking the time out of our tasks to introduce ourselves to people unfamiliar with what our coloured t-shirts mean? Are we attentive enough to pick up when someone needs reassurance or a friendly smile as they embark on a whole new season in their life? Are we communicating to all people, new or long-standing members that they are important enough to have our full attention and that help for their circumstance is on the way?

2) what does that mean?

So there I am, in pain, feeling really unwell and the results of a scan come back revealing that I need emergency surgery. Words that end in 'ectomy' are banded around, sentences that include High Dependency are said and truthfully I was none the wiser until my lovely surgeon saw the look of panic on my face, sat down and talked me through what was happening, in plain English.   ( no comment about me being Scottish or my accent please )

Now I know that the language we use, certainly in our church, is something we work really hard to be intentional about. We try to avoid the Christianese that becomes second nature really quickly. But have you ever thought through the words you use or the explanations you offer?

I remember once having a conversation with a lady who responded, by putting her hand in the air, during the altar call (altar call - what does that even mean?). I said to her afterwards when we met to pray and for me to give her a bible, "so you made a decision?"

I was referring of course to her response but she looked at me blankly before saying, "I've made lots of decisions!"

And of course she is right. She decided to come to church, she decided whether to have tea or coffee, where to sit, to stand in the worship time, and to put her hand up at the end. What she really needed was for me to ask, "what made you respond in that way?" Or "that's so great you decided to respond to what pastor Jon said, do you have any questions I could help you with?" Not to use the language of 'our kingdom' with someone who is visiting there for the first time.

You don't need me to tell you that there are dozens of words that we use to explain our faith (redemption, salvation, sanctification, the rapture???, Pentecostal, charismatic, tithes, fellowship (genuinely thought that was a boat for men when I was in Sunday School) and commitment that people outside of the house won't know. I guess my challenge and encouragement is to go back through your own understanding of the gospel and frame it in such a way that you could explain it to a child. Not that all adults need to be patronised, but if you can't say it simply it's maybe that you don't understand it yourself.

3) who are these people?

If you've never been to a hospital let me introduce you to the multi-coloured, multi-titled wonder that is the medical workforce. Contrary to the respect code taught at primary school or by your grandparents, some doctors in hospital don't like the title and instead opt simply for Mr. There are some who you can simply call 'doctor' and some whose name you will never be told. There are doctors in various sets of surgical pyjamas (some blue, some red), doctors in white coats and some in whatever they like. There are teams of nurses; pink ones, blue ones, ones in dark blue and a workforce in black uniforms and some in white dresses and trousers. Oh, did I forget those in green bringing patients in from ambulances. Confusing isn't it?

At my lowest, and most ill, it was a concern to me to find out who was who. I wanted to know who was responsible for my care, and who it was appropriate to call on for help. I had a few awkward moments when I thought the scruffy man was a ward clerk when he turned out to be a senior consultant.

But in church life I think this is really important. I've been part of our church for years and years and I am still meeting new people and learning about families who have been there are long as I have. Now imagine you are new to church or new to your church. You know about 'church' from the telly, so you expect to see a vicar or some sort of priest wandering around. How will they know in our church, or your church, who that is?

Introductions and explanations are so important. Even if your pastor is busy - which they undoubtably will be - point them out and talk them up. Then think about the wider team. Is this new family aware that we have youth pastors or kids workers. Have we explained what the smiley people in blue t-shirts do? Have you introduced them to a connect group host?

I always feel more safe and secure in any environment, whether work, social or in church, when I feel like I know someone else in the room and know who I should speak to about whatever I need. I don't think I'm alone in that.

4) when's my next appointment

"See you at your appointment mrs Bruce," were the final words from my doctor on leaving hospital. Great, except, when is that?

Simply, we don't want to bombard people with information when we first meet but we do want to let them know not only that they are welcome back, but also that they have opportunities galore to continue meeting with God.

I remember when I got saved (more Christianese, sorry folks) - I thought you prayed the prayer and that was it. I didn't know you needed to come back. I mean, I knew people who did go every week, but I assumed it was because they had jobs to do or they worked there. The concept of worship and devoting myself to God, was unknown. It was my friend who talked me through getting to know God through his word, and that because I was new to this perhaps I would learn more by coming regularly, and that by coming regularly I would become part of community and I too could serve.

Are we assuming people know what's on, or what church is? Or we explaining and inviting and bringing?

To bring this to a close the truth is simply this, if I was to go back to that hospital, the place where I was helped back to physical wholeness, if would be more at home and more comfortable just by getting a handle on all of the above.

If we are to be co-workers with Christ, is seeing those without Christ become spiritually whole with Him, then we need to be people focused in everything we do too.

It's certainly a challenge for me.

Before the need for flowers

I'VE had a string of thoughts and feelings going through my head recently that I've found difficult to articulate. Which, for me (rent-a-gob) is an interesting place to be.

With Nathan and I 'moving room' within our church, seeing us moving from Teesside to Newcastle, a change of job and news of my grandmother's serious illness, there's a lot of emotions fighting for prominence in my head and heart. But a couple of things have happened - culminating in something I saw today, that sparked this little Marks and Spencer cafe musing.

Forgive the length of this. Brevity is not my friend. Here goes...

The first was at Christmas.  Out of the blue we received a card from a girl who was part of our youth group when we were Youth Pastors in Dartford.  Not only was there a Nando's gift card (she knows us well) but beautiful words thanking us for the part we played in building her faith while she was a teenager. In all honesty, it was a small part that we played, but none the less we were overwhelmed and humbled by her words and the fact that while she is now thriving in a great church, under fantastic leaders, she took the time to acknowledge two people who had for a relatively short time, been part of her Christian walk.

The next, was on getting the news that my Gran may only have weeks left with us. A prompt and disorganised trip to Scotland finished with me coughing out words that I hope she already knew, but that I simply HAD  to say before we left. She is a huge and still significant part of who I am today and I couldn't let the opportunity pass, however snotty and teary it became, to tell her how grateful I am.

But this morning, en route to a meeting, just after the school run I noticed something that brought  all these thoughts and experiences to a blog culmination. There, walking down the road, was a young guy, carrying a massive arrangement of flowers, heading to the graveyard. Excuse my absolute judgement at face value here but he didn't look the type to be a regular flower buyer (what was I expecting - Alan Titchmarsh???) but there he was, probably £50 poorer for his purchase of these beautiful flowers. This simple thought crossed my mind, 'I wonder if he bought them flowers while they were still alive?'

Now don't get me wrong, I love to see beautifully tended graves with families lovingly honoring the memory and life of their loved ones, I do. But imagine how sad it would be if the only flowers a person receives is after they have the ability to enjoy them.

Even worse, imagine if the only thanks a person is given, if the only acknowledgement awarded, is after it has the ability to impact the person being spoken about. Often these days we are able to showcase our blessings via Instagram or Facebook, right alongside our grievances and frustrations - but how often in the sea of mixed emotions do we take the time to stand back, take a look at the people we have become, and pay tribute the small army of those who will be responsible for getting you to where you are today?

And so by means of encouragement - in a bid to spark a mini movement of gratitude  and flower buying - I want to say thank you to some people today.

It all starts of course with my parents who tried their best to dissuade me from this Christianity thing, but who inadvertently shaped me into a strong woman - and bearer of the world's best grandchildren. Your strong minds and opinions cultivated in me a drive to fight injustice and speak up for those who struggle. Thank you. I love you both.

Then there's the people in our home churches.

This is important. Because for me to be where I am today, at some point I had to LEAVE where I was. I say this because as the years have rolled on I have been on the opposite side of this. Where people have left my church, or my life. It hurts, let's be honest. But it's not the leaving per se. All of us have left somewhere to get to where we are now. Excuse my blatant honestly, but it's the lack of acknowledgement on leaving that I think is the hardest. 

Often for people to even come to the conclusion that they want to leave one place for another means they have gone on an incredible spirit-filled, faith-led journey and are now pursuing more of God than ever before. I've seen people's lives flourish and then they go. I thank God for my time with them, and for his transformation in them but being human and all, I wonder if they've forgotten how far they've come. My pastor made a joke the other day, that he knows all the things he does wrong, because people tell him when they leave. Sad, isn't it?

But honestly, I would be found guilty of this too. It's easy to comment on the wrong, or to not comment at all, it takes much more humility and honour to acknowledge the right. This is my attempt at righting some of my own wrongs. There have been times, when I've been arrogant and outspoken and have 'left' without grace and love.

Sometimes I've done it well though :)

I remember phoning a pastor in Middlesbrough to tell her we had one of their young people coming to us now. I told her she had done a great job because we were so thankful this person was now part of 'us'. Apparently acknowledgement of previous investment was rare.

Nathan is from Dartford and I'm from Harthill. If it wasn't for the Galloways and the Curles and their extended families I doubt I would be here now. And I know for Nathan the ongoing love and support of Roy and Keely Morley was without doubt the biggest influence on his life and set him, and now us, up for ministry life. We are forever in your collective debt.

Our first jobs out of bible college were in Dartford too and our senior pastors there, Ray and Janet Bindra, allowed us the freedom to cut our teeth and learn our craft. When we left we did it as well as we could, but thanks there needs to be given because on that occasion they probably felt, as I have done as a pastor, hurt. Before God we are truly grateful to you for giving us a chance, believing in us and giving us the freedom to teach - and paint walls hideous shades of blue and silver - (and dress your elders as widow Twankie for a panto) in your church. We love you both.

On moving up here Pastor Cliff Henderson took a chance on this young couple with a baby and said, 'go and plant a church' - he even sorted out some finance! He's still one of our biggest cheerleaders. Cliff and Olwyn, we love you.

And then there's Jon and Dee.

This is where it's crucially important.

Because we are with these people now, and have no intention of ever leaving. 

So I don't have to say this. I want to.

Nathan and I have never known a couple who have invested so much - without ever considering a return for that investment. When we were yet to be part of NCLC they fed us (in every way - we still owe you at least one meal out!), nurtured us and pastored us, and now, as part of their community, they continue to believe in us and allow us the tremendous privilege of serving on their team. Jon Cook is probably one of the most gracious people I have ever known. That verse, about love covering a multitude of sins... God wrote that with Jon in mind. If you haven't seen that side of Jon you don't know him. Dee is just beautiful. In every flippin' way. But you can't be jealous because she's beautiful inside too. Thank you both. We consider your family ours. 

To our friends. The real ones who rescue us, and love on us, and continue to want to be part of our lives, who understand our margins, or lack of them, and come to us, to the ones who we speak to once a year and are cool with that, to the ones who challenge us even when it hurts, to the ones who will be part of our lives - even from a distance - for ever. Thank you. To those who love my children, you are special to us - thank you so much for speaking life over my kids. 

Most of the time we are rubbish friends, we never remember birthdays, we rarely send Christmas cards but I promise you I'll be there at 2am if you need us, and vow to be forever bringers of Irn Bru and Friends one-liners. You are loved and appreciated every minute.

I need to sneak in Terry and Anne Young here, the pastors of Middlesbrough Community Church. You love without gain, you serve without ceasing and you championed us and encouraged us at every opportunity. Youngies we love ya!

And finally to all those who will become part of our lives. Maybe for a season, maybe for the rest of our lives. You are important to us. Sorry for all the times I will forget to tell you that. But you will make an imprint on me and my children. And maybe we will on you too. Thanks.

I think I'm done for now. There are of course many more people I could mention. 

But for now , I am no need of flowers, unless I just see them and think my friend will like them.

Actually, I'm enjoying a vase of tulips that my new boss sent me to say thanks. 

Wherever you are, there was a journey to get there. Make sure you acknowledge the people who helped you on your way, before the need for flowers.